On Being Short
Some days I’m tempted to leave the house with bedhead simply because it adds a few extra inches to my height. If you combine two inches of hair and three inches in high heels, I might actually reach 5’5″. Of course, that would mean I’d be leaving with bedhead, and ending the day with a broken ankle. The truth is that when you are only five feet tall, even adding three-inch heels still leaves you short.
People often ask me how tall I am. When I tell them, the next thing they usually say is “I thought you were taller than that!”
That’s because I have a very tall personality.
There are, of course, challenges to being “under-tall.” Short girls struggle with some day-to-day things.
- Top shelves are practically useless to us. (My top kitchen shelves hold those things I seldom use…and don’t usually remember that I have.)
- We always need help in stores to reach things that normal-height people can reach easily.
- Our feet never touch the floor in restaurants.
- Every dress, skirt, and pair of pants needs to be shortened.
- You’re in the front row of every group photo you are ever in.
- You can get lost in a crowd of children.
- You can get claustrophobic in a crowd of adults.
- You can never see the stage or screen in a theater.
- Running into a doorknob leaves bruises on your upper arm.
- You are everyone’s armrest.
- You can never see through the peep hole in a hotel room.
- Bar stools are difficult, if not impossible, to sit on.
- You need a step stool to get into trucks.
But it’s not all bad. There are a few perks, too.
- Almost every dance partner you ever have is taller than you…even when you’re in heels.
- No one ever expects you to reach things for them.
- It’s not as far to fall if you trip over anything.
- Nothing is ever too short for you to wear.
- Legroom on an airplane or other public transport isn’t an issue.
- Your feet never hang off the end of any bed.
- Similarly, napping on a couch is never a problem.
- You are seldom anywhere where you might bump your head.
- Smaller shoe sizes mean you can sometimes buy children’s shoes at a lower price.
Even so, here are a few pieces of advice for average-height and tall people when working with us shorties:
- We may be the perfect height to use as an armrest – but don’t. (Or we’ll bite you in the knee.)
- You don’t need to remind us how short we are. We are well aware. (And we will refrain from asking how the weather is “up there.”)
- Don’t squat down to talk to us. We are used to being short. We never get used to being patronized.
- Don’t assume we can’t do something. We will tell you if we need help or need to opt out.
I don’t mind being short. Just don’t ask me to play basketball.
Your bedheaded blogger,